Monday, May 21, 2007

Becoming the Spiritual leader of your family in two months

Nearly every Christian man longs to be the spiritual leader of his family. Being the spiritual leader is the reality for some men. However for many, and I suggest most, it is only a dream. So, why does it seem impossible to take this biblical role in your family within a two month timeframe? God could actually do it overnight. I am here to tell you that it is not only possible, it actually happened in my life. Over a two month period of time, by God’s grace, I became the spiritual leader of my family.

Here’s my story:
It will be my 16th wedding anniversary on June 8th of this year. For over 13 years of my marriage I was not the spiritual leader of my family. By failing to step up and accept my spiritual role, I delegated this role to my wife who did not want this responsibility that God had actually given to me. Why? Why didn’t I jump at the opportunity to be “THE LEADER”? Don’t we all want to be leaders, the one in charge, the one who makes the decisions, the head honcho? In every other area of our marriage I gladly took the leadership role. However, when it came to being the spiritual leader I sheepishly bowed out.

As I look back I can identify why. The primary issue involved my relationship with God. The secondary issue involved my wife’s relationship with God. Bottom line, my wife had a passionate and vibrant relationship with Christ that was lived out in real intimacy: she sought God in prayer and time in his word while I did not. My wife is an incredible woman of God. She loves the Lord immensely and has been drawn to his word in study, prayer and mediation ever since Christ entered her life as a child. She has always taken her relationship with God seriously.

In contrast, after receiving Christ at age 11, I went into spiritual autopilot. In other wards, I just kinda went with the flow. I attended church, joined a small group or two, and even was a member of our church worship team. However, I was what I call an ornamental orange Christian - I looked great on the outside, but when the shiny peel was removed it uncovered a spiritually dry and bitter inside. I did not passionately seek God’s face in sincere prayer and meditation on his Word. I was actually living for myself and not for God.

So, the primary issue was my relationship with God. In addition to this, I was intimidated by my wife’s intense relationship with God. I felt I could never spend that kind of time in the word; not enough to catch up to her. I thought I could never be the spiritual leader of our family. I believed I could never really be my wife’s spiritual covering because the bar was set way too high. I later found out that this was a lie from the enemy.

A little over 2 years ago, God got hold of my heart and my life in a big way. I finally woke up, surrendered, began to die to self, and started seeking God with a new found passion. Prayer and time in his Word became a significant, no the significant, focus of each day. God started to speak to me through his Word. I began to daily share with my wife the incredible truth that God was revealing to me. Within a two-month period of time I had become the spiritual leader of my family. By God’s grace the impossible happened. In a short two months, God had corrected over 13 years of my negligence. He didn’t make me study his word for 13 years before doing this miracle. No, he mercifully righted the roles in our marriage and in our family nearly overnight.

This was the prayer of my wife’s heart for over 13 years. I had finally taken on the leadership role that God had always intended for me. My wife finally has her spiritual covering. Let’s never forget that God is in the business of miracles; he is in the business of restoration; he is in the business of transformation.

11 comments:

BMorgan said...

Awesome testimony! This would be a great message to add to the "American Family" series at church. They should give you some time during the services:) Your openness really speaks to me.

Eric Jones said...

Brian, thank you for the encouragement. God is good and his word really does renew our minds and transforms our lives.

Sam said...

I have to ask: spiritual covering?

Jason Schifo said...

Switch the names and the time frame (3 years versus 14 years) and this is essentially my story also.
God can do amazing things in your life - He transforms us. But we have to let Him in - We have to create Intentional time to fellowship with him. We have to put Him first.
Brian you are the type of Christian that just excites my soul.

Scott said...

Thank you for this encouragement Eric. I've been struggling with this issue for my entire relationship with my wife...

Your testimony shows me that even I can be "transformed" -- because "nothing is impossible with God." [Luke 1:37]

David said...

Thank you so much for this testimony... Im 22 and engaged for 2 years and long to be spiritual leader and this opened my eyes to see where I need to make a big change in my life.

Anonymous said...

Thank you so much for this. I needed to hear this in my life today. Walking through the same thing right now with older kids (11&14). I am encouraged

Bill said...

Thank you for your testimonial. I have always struggled with taking the leadership role in our family. I am the more passive between my wife and I. I was glad to see that many men struggle with taking the spiritual leadership role in there family's. Your post has inspired me to pray and use Gods guidance to become the leader of my family

Daniel Black said...

A girl and I have decided to separate for two months exactly to listen to God in regards to our relationship and see if God has us for one another or not. During this time I felt God was going to grow me in becoming a spiritual leader for our relationship, so I went online and this was the very first website I found. "Becoming the Spiritual leader of our family in TWO months." Two months! The exact time of our separation. Praise God for this encouraging testimony and affirmation of what He is going to bring me through these next couple months.

Anonymous said...

Thanks for the testemony. I'm in the same place you where a few years ago. Time to step up to be what God has called me to be.

Caley said...

Eric, I am going through this same situation right now. I was working out in my spare room, when a bible my parents gave me when I was 13 began to basicly jump off of the bookshelf. My wife was in tears two days ago, because she called me out. I was being that "artifical orange" christian. I am the youth leader at church, help out on the worship team sometimes and have even spoken a few times. My spiritual walk with the Lord has been a rollercoaster of hot and cold periods. Right now I am on a cold downward spiral and despirately seeking to get back into an intimate relationship with Jesus. The enemy has been keeping me at bay by using my past to wound my spirit and my relationship with God. I have been trying to make a concious effort to rebuke Satan, but I know the power is in the Word and I have neglected it. Thank God that we serve a forgiving God who is always there when we need Him. I just wanted to say thank you for sharing your story. It was a revelation to me and what I need to do for my relationship with the Lord and for my family.
Love in Christ,
Danny Wolfe